Lost Connections

Remember earlier this month when FB & IG (and WhatsApp) all went down at once? And at first everyone thought it was their connection. But then it became clear it was definitely something bigger than our local provider crapping out. I had friends who thought they’d been thrown back into FB jail when they couldn’t connect. And the weird thing was, I couldn’t check with some of my closest social media connections to see if they were having issues because we’d always communicated through FB or IG messenger. At first it was no big deal. But as the day went on and rumors started to fly on Twitter about what was happening, I started to get anxious. Not because I was worried my meme supply would be lost forever. But because some of my closest connections were through FB & IG. And I didn’t know how to reach them. And I wanted to. I felt a little lost without those daily connections I had gotten so used to.

It was almost like withdrawal. I kept checking my phone and computer to see if the platforms were back up. I needed my friend fix. I’m not a fan of Twitter, so after peaking in to see what the Twitterverse had to say, I quickly scampered away. It was way too overwhelming for me (yeah, I’m old). And the nastiness that flies on there makes my brain and heart hurt, so I don’t spend enough time there to easily navigate through the clog of information. I asked The Google about the outage and followed some articles to stay in the loop instead. Yeah, I definitely feel old now.

Around dinnertime I remembered that my closest social media connections had signed up for my blog! I emailed them my cell number and told them to text me if they had a chance. I just needed to find and reestablish that connection. It’s not like I don’t have close friends nearby I could reach out to. I do. And I did. But those online connections have become just as close, and honestly there are things I share with them that I can’t, don’t, and won’t share with other friends. They provide a particular and specific element of support and camaraderie that I really do rely on them for.

I knew the platforms would be up eventually, but it didn’t stop me from wondering what and how things would change with a long-term outage, or even if one of the platforms disappeared. Most of the authors I follow rely heavily on social media. They use it to communicate with readers and other authors, as well as promote their books and events. It’s a major aspect of their livelihood. Let’s face it, social media is the lifeblood of indie authors. Yes, they have newsletters, but those often go to spam folders, and they’re definitely not that immediate connection. And Amazon runs ads for their books. But social media by far is their biggest advertising and connection tool. I found most of the authors I love through FB or IG. Some through ads, but most through groups and other readers. Take that connection away and it’s an entirely new ballgame for those authors. And for their readers.

Once everything finally came back on-line, I amused myself by reading about what others said they did when their favorite apps were down. I got a lot of reading and writing done. Others used the time to go outside and take a walk, work in their garden, or wash their car. Some combined both outside time and books and read outside. In the sunshine! What I didn’t do was try to figure out Twitter. Because, nope. I don’t need that kind of negativity when I can’t combat it with all the pretty things on IG. And I didn’t venture over to LinkedIn either. I didn’t see a lot of other people I know posting about looking for alternate connections either. What I did see was a lot of blind faith that eventually all would be returned to normal and we could go about our merry lives in social media bliss. And I saw a lot of people talking about how they needed to get friends’ contact information off-line so when this happens again we can still reach out and connect.

Several months ago there was a similar scare in the romance book world when multiple authors had their private reader groups shut down without warning or reason. FB quoted “content against community standards” and deemed their decisions final. Writers lost content, a marketing platform, and a way to communicate with their readers. It sent other writers into a panic looking for alternate platforms as well in case their groups were also shut down. The loss of those groups was a tremendous blow to those independent authors. It not only severed a connection between them and their readers, it disrupted the community they had created between and among their readers and other authors. And unlike the outage it wasn’t for a few hours, it was permanent. And that was a huge loss to those authors and their reader communities.

Both of these situations brought one new reality into startling clarity: How we make and maintain connections is just as important as the connections we’ve made. I truly felt lost without being able to chat with friends I only know online. I realized they are important enough to me to find other ways to reach them. And that validated our connections in a way I never really thought about. And to me, that’s pretty damn cool.